Friday, May 4, 2007

Israelis defend use of rubber bullets, then withdraw press release

Israeli leaders and Jewish American activists defended the use of rubber bullets at last week's protests, and issued the following statement.

"Rubber bullets are a humane way to respond to peaceful insurgencies from terrorist sympathizing criminals and non-Jews in Palestine," the leaders said in a joint statement after the protest.

But as they were reading the statement, an aide rushed into the room and pointed out that the rubber bullets were used not in Palestine last week against the usual suspects of peaceful Palestinian protestors and Nobel Peace Prize winners, but rather at supporters of immigration reform in Los Angeles, where dozens of people were injured there, too.

"Ah, we want to point out that the rubber used in the bullets against bloodthirsty Palestinian terrorist murderers Jew-hating anti-Semites and celebrators of Sept. 11 with dancing and handing out candies who kill their own people and celebrate death by dressing up babies as martyrs and suicide bombers ... (pause) ... are not the same as the unjustified rubber bullets used to squelch a peaceful protest of Mexicans in Los Angeles last week. There is a difference!"

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