Terrorists used a Western tradition to undermine the FOX Network Security program "24," confusing terrorist crime fighter Jack Bauer and foiling plans to protect the country from a nuclear attack against Washington D.C.
Jack Bauer failed to protect America, after he was released only 22 hours earlier from a Chinese prison, because he forget to calculate the impact of Daily Savings Time on his 24 Hour plan to save the world from terrorists.
The critical error occurred during hour 23 when Daily Savings Time kicked in, on the west coast, and caused Bauer to fail in his goal
FOX Network TV changed the original script for the show (review the original script by clicking here) and released the following amended script of the anti-Terrorists activities in the final hours:
7:00 P.M.-8:00 P.M. Jack Bauer has broken a nail and mascara is runnign down his right eye, forcing FOX TV executive to send Bauer back to makeup. He runs into Marilyn who reveals that she was having a lesbian affair with Audrey Raines, when she was killed trying to save him from China by sleeping with two of the female Chinese guards. Audrey, Marilyn explained, had an endless series of multiple orgasms that sent her into anaphylactic shock. Jack is distraught, thinking that he could have had a three-some with Audrey and Marilyn, but demands to help CTU bring down the terrorists to avenge Audrey’s death and their cheating him out of a ménage à trois. Despite his disappointment, Jack leads the field ops team to find Gredenko’s men and he is about to land the drone carrying the nuclear weapon.
But the next hour, when Bauer supposedly will bring the nuclear armed drone down, is erased by Daylight Savings Time, and the drone reaches it's target in the next hour, which is really now the prior hour.
8:00 P.M.-9:00 P.M. CANCELLED: Jack was to have apprehended the man obtaining nuclear power plant access for Gredenko. Jack was to have used the man’s autistic brother to lure Gredenko. Gredenko was supposed to give up Fayed in return for full amnesty and the promise he won’t turned over to Russia.
9:00 P.M.-10:00 P.M. Washington D.C. is destroyed. Nancy Pelosi is in Syria when the explosion takles place and she is immediately elected president since every other successor has been incinerated in the nuclear holocaust. Jack and a field team take a wired Gredenko to meet Fayed, but Gredenko goes missing. Gredenko has severed his arm using a Boyscout knife to elude the CTU tracking implant. Jack tails Fayed and Gredenko to a Gay bar, where the patrons have captured Fayed whom they recognize from the news. Jack apprehends Fayed but Gredenko escapes.
Next season, FOX announced it will schedule the 6th Season of "24" so as to avoid overlapping with Daylight Savings Time changes in the future and thereby saves the American people from another terrorist nuclear attack from fanatic Islamic extremist terrorist homiciders.
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1 comment:
Classic like it keep doing the good work!
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